Long adaptation

Now in hindsight, I came to realize that my eternal hate towards the place was probably quite unjustified. The thing is, that I severely underestimated the importance and difficulties of “growing up” after I finished high school. I do not blame myself for this as this is only natural if you are a 20 year old boy who just finished high school and thinks that there is no more to learn other than the stuff they teach you at university. Especially when you are somebody who rarely had to prepare a meal or do his own laundry for seven whole years between early puberty and early adulthood.

In the end it is not going to be the Social Cognitive Theory, Visual Crowding, or Green-Path Model that’s going to give me a (new?) perspective on life. It’s going to be the fact that I became better at spending time just with myself, learned when to reward and punish myself for good and bad stuff, or that there’s some things that will never change about me and that I should not try to alter them. Becoming independent of constant help from others is no easy job to do. I am not claiming that as of now I am a complete human being without any regrets who knows how to take the best of what life has to offer. No. In the end, learning is a lifelong process, and here I learned more than I could have ever imagined when I spent my first few months here.

In the end it was not the constant grey and rain of Aberdeen that made me feel depressed and left me thinking that I don’t belong here. It was my inability to adapt to the environment, which is different from what I was used to and requires so much more mental strength, willingness and self-control in order to survive.  Yes, I do not mind living in Aberdeen anymore. But that does not necessarily mean that I would like to stay here after I graduate. The Scottish roller coaster rider is inevitably coming to a stop, which just one last drop on the way, my thesis. And then? Maybe I will go somewhere where it will be a little easier. Negative experiences teach you a lot but I would prefer a place where I won’t have to complain about bad weather. Or maybe I’ll end up somewhere where it rains every single day but I don’t even notice it.